4/23/06 Voltage

[OrochiGeese]

*Voltage opens with a blast of pyro and confetti. We immediately
go to a slickly produced video package on the Orochi-Tron of
the OG-Joshi match at Evo.R. We see clips of Kaori NiGHT vs.
Dizzy Cavuto and the epic struggle the two had. To see the
full match (and honestly, if you're reading this show, you
probably should see this match!), go here:


og-fpd.fireproclub.com/Matches/EvoRDizzyKaori.zip



*At the end of the video package, "Fields of Fantasy" begins
playing on the speakers as General Celes comes to ringside*



General Celes: "Welcome everyone to another edition of Voltage.
As you have just seen, OG-Joshi represented itself
in a very impressive fashion at Evo.R. Some say
we put on the match of the night, and I'm not
one to argue. Though we certainly shared the
night with some other phenomenal matches."

Celes: "I would like to congratulate BOTH participants
in our match, Kaori NiGHT and Diane "Dizzy"
Cavuto. The skill, heart, and intensity that
both wrestlers displayed have etched that
match in stone as one of the best Joshi
matches ever. And I'd like to thank them both
for doing it while representing OG-Joshi. It
truly lived up to the dream match atmosphere,
in fact, I dare say it exceeded it."

Celes: "Now, I am also out here to further discuss
the OG-FPD PPV. It will be held on Sunday,
May 21st, 2006 and will be officially called
OG-FPD...um...OG-FPD: "Dissonance." This
PPV represents all of the conflict and change
that can happen during it. Championships may
change hands. This PPV will be the last
OG-FPD PPV for some and the first for others.
It will mark the end of some careers here
and the beginning for others. Some of the
core wrestlers will be put to a major test."


(OG-FPD related info for the rest of her RP. Go to top link to see ENTIRE show)


*Celes leaves the ring as her "Fields of Fantasy" theme plays*



Mr. Figaro: "Whatever do you mean, good and noble sir?"

Mr. Clyde: "Yeah...let's see how long you keep that up?"

Mr. Figaro: "BOOBIES!"

Mr. Clyde: "A new record, 1.5 seconds. I'd say you
should be proud...but really..."

Mr. Figaro: "No, really, I wasn't just shouting
random things! Our next match has two
of the best boo...um, new Joshi
wrestlers in OG-Joshi!! As the delicious
Kim Cross faces off against the salty Lana!"

Mr. Clyde: "I guess Kim's rejection didn't quite
make it through that head of yours."

Mr. Figaro: "Clyde, there's only one head I listen
to, and it doesn't have ears to hear
rejection. It just keeps going!"

Mr. Clyde: "Tragically disgustingly true, it seems."

Mr. Figaro: "So, I'm just waiting for Kim to call me."

Mr. Clyde: "What about Patty Sirloin?"

Mr. Figaro: "We'll make room for her!"


Mr. Clyde: "Ahem...we have an exciting match coming
up now as OG-Joshi newcomer Lana faces
off against another new recruit, Kim Cross.
Both women have won their debut matches
and will be facing off with each other for
the first time. We'll see who can keep
their momentum and get the attention of
the fans and the other girls on the roster."

Mr. Figaro: "They got my attention piqued!"

Mr. Clyde: "I couldn't have guessed that at all."

Mr. Figaro: "Which is why I told you!"

Mr. Clyde: "That whole sarcasm approach...not your thing?"

Mr. Figaro: "Nope! I like full frontal...um, concepts!"

Mr. Clyde: "Then you will be happy to see the concept
of competition fully acted out in front of
our eyes. As the very tough fighter Lana
faces off against the polished wrestler, Kim."

Mr. Figaro: "Kim has a lot of interesting holds."

Mr. Clyde: "You keep talking about Kim that way, and
I'll tell Patty Sirloin."


Mr. Figaro: "!! No!! Quick, get to the match now!"



Match #1: Lana vs. Kim Cross





*POST MATCH SPOILERS*





























Mr. Clyde: "A very competitive match from both
women. They went 15 minutes with each
other until Kim Cross utilized one of
her finishers, the Kim Crossface."


Mr. Figaro: "Doesn't Lana utilize a crossface too?"

Mr. Clyde: "Indeed she does, we have seen her win
a match with one, in fact. She beat
Lisa Robinson with it a few weeks ago."


Mr. Figaro: "Oh SNAP! Lana's gonna be PISSED! She
just got served with her own meal!"


Mr. Clyde: "Wh...what?"

Mr. Figaro: "She just had to whip her own pudding!"

Mr. Clyde: "That didn't help my understanding. And
I dare say it just turned about 20%
of our viewers away."

Mr. Figaro: "Lana just had to toss her own...


Mr. Clyde: "Lana fought hard during the match but
Kim was able to secure the victory.
I think either woman could have walked
away the winner tonight and I'd be
surprised if this was the last encounter
between the two. Especially taking into
account Kim using the crossface to win."

Mr. Figaro: "Well, the "Kim Cross"face does sound
pretty cool. Get it, with the name?"

Mr. Clyde: "I think we're all a few steps ahead of
you on that one."

Mr. Figaro: "If she crossed over my face, I'd be
tapping out!"


Mr. Clyde: "Long story short, Kim wins, Lana
doesn't. I'm sure she'll have
something to say. But let's move on..."






*END POST MATCH SPOILERS*




Mr. Figaro: "You didn't let me finish talking about...



*Regal's Knights music plays as the NWA Champion, Steven
Regal and Vader come to the ring with a microphone*


Mr. Clyde: "You were saying?"


Mr. Figaro: "Uh...."


Mr. Clyde: "Just sit back and watch your favorite
wrestler. Don't let ole Kim distract you."


Mr. Figaro: "Regal...rules...alllllllllllll"


*Regal and Vader get into the ring.*



Regal: "I say, I'm quite enjoying these
"Joshi matches." Between Kim Cross
and Haley Cannon, we have quite a lot
of talented British tarts rolling about!"


Mr. Figaro: "And you wonder why Regal is the best!?"

*Mr. Clyde sighs*


Regal: "But I'm not out here to find a Queen
to take my Rook, if you know what I mean..."

Figaro: "I do! I so do!...uh, I think! YEAH!"


(More OG-FPD Stuff)



Mr. Clyde: "While Mr. Figaro hyperventilates due
to excitement of seeing Regal, we're
gonna go to a brief commercial break."



*Commercials for Evo.R. See this show....or turn into a sock*




Mr. Figaro: "Is there really past precedent for turning
into a sock if they don't...oh hi everyone!
We're back from the commercial break and
ready for our next match...which is...uh..."


Mr. Clyde: "Well, the main event tonight is the Joshi
Battle Royale for the #1 Contenders Spot
and a shot at the Joshi Title during the
main event of the July PPV."


Mr. Figaro: "So I guess THAT's next...



*"Barbie Girl" leaks onto the speakers as none other then,
wait..what is SHE doing here? She's not scheduled to debut!"


Mr. Figaro: "Wow, if Mr. Asterisk is confused, then
we're really in for trouble!"


Mr. Clyde: "I have worse news then that, it appears
that is the music for new OG-Joshi
trainee...Sandy Morton."


Mr. Figaro: "Did you just say R.."


Mr. Clyde: "I most certainly did not."


*"Sandy Morton makes her way down to ringside in a pink bikini
bottom and white bikini top. Neither half of her clothing seems
to adequately be doing the job. Also, it appears Sandy might be
drunk. She gets a mic.*

Sandy: "Why, lookee here! I, Sandy Morton, am on OG-Joshi Voltage!!
Hi everyone! Hi to all my friends in Cally! My LA girls, my OC girls,
my butlers!"

Sandy: "Now...I'm not supposed to be here yet cause I'm still
"in training." But I'm tired of training in the OG-JOshi gym
any more! It's so stinky and people are sweating and grunting
and not shopping or shaking their twins in wet tshirts! And
if I'm tired of something, then I stop doing it! Like working,
or thinking! Let's party!"

*The crowd issues a collective "meh"*

Sandy: "Fine, not impressed huh? Geeks!! So I am here to demand
my first Joshi match! I'll take on anyone here! I'll take on the
champ! I deserve to be the champ!? Why!? Cause I say so! You can't
argue with that!""

*"Faint" hits the speakers as Diva Dynamite comes out..
with a microphone. Wait, did I get that right...Diva with a mic?
Run! Run for your lives everyone!! *

Mr. Figaro: "Let's um, hear what Diva has to say."

Diva: "N... now you l-l-listen to me, Sandy! I've... been here
WAY LONGER than you and... And if anyone deserves an opportunity
for a match-- a match to climb up the ladder in OG-Joshi then...
then it should be me!"

Sandy: "When did I say anything about a ladder? I don't climb
ladders, painters do! And who the hell are you? Batgirl?"

Diva: "Diva Dynamite!! You think that... You think you're good
enough t-t--to be the Joshi World-- I mean, OG-Joshi World Champion?
You and me...let's have a ma..."

*Sandy gets in Diva's face and SLAPS Diva, and Diva just stands
there, stunned.*

Diva: "Oh! You bit---"

*Diva slaps back and we have a ...

Mr. Figaro: "CATFIIIIIIII..."

Mr. Clyde: "We're gonna have a lawsuit if you finish that word
the way I think you will..."

Mr. Figaro: "Cat fighter in the fed named Kat Black!"

Mr. Clyde: "Nice save."

Mr. Figaro: "But look at Diva and Sandy, they are slapping
each other silly!"

*An OG-Joshi ref rolls into the ring to seperate them.
Sandy whispers in the refs ears and the ref nods. The ref
goes over to Diva and whispers to her, Diva nods. Sandy
takes the microphone again.*

Sandy: "Here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna have
ourselves an old fashioned "BITCHSLAP" match! This is
what my cool friends and I used to do in high school
to humiliate people!! Worked most of the time too!"

Mr. Clyde: "I bet I can guess one time it didn't..."

p201.ezboard.com/fogfpdjoshifrm7.showMessage?topicID=112.topic

Sandy: "The winner of this match will go on to have a regular
wrestling match immediately after! So let's go Diva...I'm gonna
slap you til you're pink in the face..."

Diva: "But, um... My face is already pink---"

Sandy: "ATTACK!!!!!"

*And the match is on!! Sandy charges at Diva who sidesteps her.
SLAP from Diva!! Right cross slap lands across Sandy's face!
Sandy fires back with a left handed slap that catches Diva
across the mask! Diva reeling as Sandy tackles her! They are
rolling on the ground but Diva is able to grab a hold of one
of the ropes for stability and leverage! Diva on top and is
slapping the hell out of Sandy Morton!*

Mr. Clyde: "This doing anything for you?"

Mr. Figaro: "This really SHOULD be doing a lot for me,
but there's something rotten about that Sandy Morton.
I can...I can smell her sleaze. Eewww...I have standards
you know! Not everything is pure enough for the Fig-man!
My body is a temple"

Mr. Clyde: "...of sin."

Mr. Figaro: "Yeah, but even sin has its limit! Sandy Morton is just...."

Mr. Clyde: "I think she's about done right now.."

*Diva continues her assault on Sandy. She picks her up and
winds up....HUGE ROUNDHOUSE RIGHT HAND SLAP TO SANDY's face!
And Sandy goes down faster then...she did last night!
The referee has stopped this match and awarded it to Diva!*


Diva Dynamite (O) (1:12 - Roundhouse Slap) Sandy Morton (X)


Mr. Clyde: "Did we really need structure for those results?"

Diva: "Ok, so, now who is m-my opponent?!"

*The ref whispers to Diva and Diva almost falls over.
She gets a "deer in headlights" look and starts to panic.*

Diva: "OMG! Sandy...um, I was wrong...i was wro--
wrong to take an opportunity from you! Away from you!
I'm sorry! Here, um... you can have the... You can have
this next match....I forfeit....take it!"

*Diva runs the hell away from the ring and into the crowd.
She runs all the way through the crowd to the exit and
continues running til she hits a wall on the other side
of the street from the arena. She'll be ok folks*



Sandy: "Looks like I'll get my match! See, I
ALWAYS get what I want! ALWAYS! In
fact, I want a victory now and...



*"Tier" by Rammstein plays as Juli Kriegercomes down to the ring*



Mr. Figaro: "Oh.My.G.."

Mr. Clyde: "Again...don't get sued."

Mr. Figaro: "Oh.My.Gosh!"


Mr. Clyde: "Folks...it looks like Juli Krieger is
about to make her in ring return after
a month suspension. And we know she
was none too happy about that. I think
sandy Morton, for as annoying as she
is, is in the wrong place at the wrong
time. Not even Sandy deserves this."


Mr. Figaro: "This may be Sandy's first and last match
in OG-Joshi. Juli does not look happy.
And Sandy is completely ignorant as
to who Juli is and what she's capable
of. And not cause this is Juli's first
match here either...Sandy just seems
yanno...stupid."


Mr. Clyde: "She's going to seem "writhing in pain"
within the next 5 minutes."


Mr. Figaro: "Heh heh..."


Mr. Clyde: "Let's not belabor this any longer. The
quicker this is over, the better."




Match #2: Surprising debut vs. Surprising return!







*POST MATCH SPOILERS*













(Yeah, cause THIS one will be a hard one to predict!)















Mr. Clyde: "5 minutes...Todestropfen."


Mr. Figaro: "Why do I get the feeling that will
become a very common phrase around here?"

Mr. Clyde: "Well, not if Alicia Gordon has her way.
But I think we all saw what Juli is
again capable of. She just ripped Sandy
apart and crushed her body against
everything available. Sandy is going
to have to get taken out on a stretcher."


Mr. Figaro: "I think Juli was going easy on her too,
that's the scary thing. I think Juli
almost ENJOYED letting Sandy get some
miniscule offence in, just to again
crush her whenever she wanted. Sandy
did no damage whatsoever to Juli."


Mr. Clyde: "I'm sure Alicia Gordon is watching this."


Mr. Figaro: "Alicia...take our advice...stay at home.
Or at least stay out of Juli's way."


Mr. Clyde: "I don't think Alicia scares easily.
We all heard what she had to say the
last few weeks. And whether she is
or isn't actually ready, she believes
she can come back here and rid OG-Joshi
of Juli Krieger once she returns here."


Mr. Figaro: "Well, its possible that Juli just rid
OG-Joshi of Sandy Morton. Sandy is just
knocked unconscious and the medics have
taken her backstage. Juli just stands
in the ring with a depraved smile of
domination on her face."


Mr. Clyde: "I try to stay impartial, I really do,
but I really hope Alicia does what
she says she will do. I do not like
Juli one bit. She is as dangerous
to OG-Joshi as Alicia says."


Mr. Figaro: "You know Clyde...I agree, I really do.
We can't have her going around hurting
any more hotties like Alicia!"


Mr. Clyde: "I think Alicia is doing the right thing,
I just hope she doesn't pay a big price
in attempting to do it. But we're still
a few months away from Alicia returning
to OG-Joshi, so we'll have to wait
and see for now."


Mr. Figaro: "In the meantime, what kind of path of
destruction will Juli continue to
travel on? By the time Alicia gets
here, will there by anyone else left
to fight for and defend!?"






*END POST MATCH SPOILERS*

[OrochiGeese]

Mr. Figaro: "And now its time for the MAIIIIIN EVENT!"


Mr. Clyde: "Eight of the best OG-Joshi wrestlers will
now step into a Battle Royale. The winner
will become the #1 Contender to the OG-Joshi
World Champion, Haley Cannon, and face her
for that title in the main event of the
OG-Joshi July PPV. This match will decide
the next 3 months of the Title picture here."


Mr. Figaro: "Every woman here wants that shot so desperately.
Being the OG-Joshi World Champion is what
it is all about. And winning that Battle Royale,
and main eventing a PPV is pretty sweet too!"


Mr. Clyde: "Of note is the fact that two competitors in
this match have recently been in huge matches
this week. Both Holly and Dizzy competed
in very important and intense matches at
Evo.R this past week. Regardless of outcome,
they both have to be coming in to this
match a bit more tired then the others."

Mr. Figaro: "Seems like a definite disadvantage for them."


Mr. Clyde: "True, Figaro, but if there are any two
women in this match that have PROVEN
they can give 100% at any occasion,
it is those two. We've seen Dizzy
compete in an injured state and look
better then some people will ever look
healthy. We've seen Dizzy pull off
seemingly miraculous comebacks against
all odds. And we've seen Holly be
crafty enough to compensate for any
fatigue or physical shortcomings by
using her most dangerous weapon."


Mr. Figaro: "Her crotch?"


Mr. Clyde: "I was referring to her mind."


Mr. Figaro: "Cause her crotch is pretty dangerous
too! She even uses it in her finisher,
the Muff Driver! Apparently Sports
Entertainment Illustrated has rated
Holly's crotch as the most dangerous
"Loose Cannon" athlete of 2005!! If
that's not proof of a weapon..."


Mr. Clyde: "Holly's cunning has gotten her through
tough situations. As has Dizzy's heart
and adrenaline. Those factors keep this
an even match despite their fatigue."

Mr. Figaro: "Speaking of cunning, we have Yoyo
Banzai in this match. And not a
match goes by where she doesn't
impress us with her mental edge
over her opponents. I think she's
a favorite going into this match.
A match where she can run up and
hit basically anyone from behind
and then escape to safety."

Mr. Clyde: "And then there's her rival, Azumi
Oonishi. She got a ringing endorsement
from Dizzy after the Emergence: Evolution
tournament. And she certainly has the
skill and the speed to make it through
this match. And the desire."

Mr. Figaro: "But you can't spell "desire" without
"P-A-T-T-Y!"


Mr. Clyde: "Actually, those two words don't
share ONE letter."


Mr. Figaro: "You gotta look past letters, Clyde!
They are holding you back! Look to
the sky! And see Patty as the shining
beacon of woman that she is! And
she's MY pick to win this match.
Not only has she made a big impression
on all of us in her short time here,
but in a match like this, she's a
definite favorite due to her power
and size. Her ample, tasty size!"


Mr. Clyde: "And then we have Jenny McLanahan.
Kind of a last minute addition to
this match. Kaori NiGHT was originally
scheduled to be here but, through the
"goodness of her heart", gave the spot
to Jenny. Kaori wanted to give Jenny
a chance to prove that she is worthy of
a championship. And I can't think of
a better way to do that then by
winning this Battle Royale. Jenny
has only had two matches in OG-Joshi
but has impressed everyone with her
wide variety of lucha abilities.
General Celes approved the substitution
so she must think Jenny is a strong
contender in this match as well."


Mr. Figaro: "One of Jenny and Kaori's rivals are
also in this match. Tigress Mask is
rebounding off two tough losses to
them and looks to regain the HUGE
momentum she had in late 2005. A
good showing here against the top
OG-Joshi wrestlers will hopefully
get her back on track. She IS the
2005 KNIT winner so she has proven
she can handle a lot of competition
and thrive in those situations."

Mr. Clyde: "And last but certainly not least,
Visper Karr. The McPro GHP Champion,
having beaten Holly a few months ago,
and one of the quickest rising stars
in OG-Joshi. She made it to the
Emergence: Revolution tournament and
had one of the best matches all year
with Dizzy. Visper has shown that she
means business and is ready to take
OG-Joshi by storm. She can do it here
and get herself a title shot. It's
hard for me to pick a winner here,
but I'd be lying if I said Visper
wasn't one of my top picks."


Mr. Figaro: "She's hot too, yanno, like SMOKING hot!"


Mr. Clyde: "Ok, and that regression from Figaro
shows that its time to get right
to the match. At least he was able
to stay professional for a while."


Mr. Figaro: "I had to, otherwise I would have gone
nuts. All those girls rolling around
in the ring together, with Patty
nonetheless...that's the Figaro
version of "blowing a funny fuse."


Mr. Clyde: "Let's get to the match and see who the
next #1 Contender will be."





Match #3: 8 woman Battle Royale for PPV shot at OG-Joshi World Title!


Patty Sirloin, Azumi Oonishi, Jenny McLanahan, Dizzy
Yoyo Banzai, Visper Karr, Tigress Mask, and Holly







*POST MATCH SPOILERS*







































Mr. Clyde: "What an incredible match."


Mr. Figaro: "36 minutes of hot Joshi on Joshi action!"

Mr. Clyde: "And Holly of Orochi Army has won the
Battle Royale with the Rolling Cradle."

Mr. Figaro: "I knew she could do it! Go Holly! Oh,
the mood in the Orochi-O's office will
definitely pick up now!"

Mr. Clyde: "This was really an amazing match."

Mr. Figaro: "I can't believe they went as long as they did!"

Mr. Clyde: "These wrestlers have incredible endurance.
And the fact that two of the last three
were the understandably tired Holly and
Dizzy, that's a further testament to
their wills. I think Dizzy's body just gave out
at the end. After her grueling match with
Kaori and going 30 plus minutes tonight."

Mr. Figaro: "Yeah, but she certainly made her presence
felt and sent a message. Imagine if she
WASN'T tired going into tonight? She
could have won two Battle Royales!"

Mr. Clyde: "And though Holly won this match, we have
to be impressed with Visper Karr and
Jenny McLanahan. Both of them pushed
hard towards the end. Visper especially.
I see her as the break out star of this
match. She resisted Holly's H-Lock 69
at the 35 minute lock! To resist such
a painful finishing hold after facing
seven other wrestlers for 35 minutes,
that says a LOT about Visper's tenacity.
She finally got beat by the Rolling Cradle
but I would say Visper's performance
tonight was incredible."


Mr. Figaro: "But in the end, it was Holly who took
further steps in proving she is indeed
the Ace of Joshi wrestling, as I'm sure
she'll let all of us know for months
and years to come! But she deserves it."


Mr. Clyde: "A lot of people make light of Holly
because of her out of ring antics. But
she has proven time and time again
how seriously she is to be taken in
the ring. Wins over Jo Ryder, Dizzy,
and tonight further prove that she
is totally deserving of the #1
Contendership. Holly is getting
that Title shot at the July PPV."


Mr. Figaro: "And we will have the first in ring
meeting between Holly and the OG-Joshi
World Champion, Haley Cannon. That
should be quite an interesting match!"


Mr. Clyde: "And we'll have more time to explore
that in the coming weeks. For now,
it's Holly's night."


Mr. Figaro: "So we should probably wrap up the
show and get everyone the hell out
of here before the bevy of male
strippers and dance music hit!"




*END POST MATCH SPOILERS*






Mr. Clyde: "We hope you enjoyed Voltage tonight,
especially the epic Battle Royale
we just watched. We will see you
in two weeks, on Sunday May 7th."


Mr. Figaro: "We have 3 exciting matches for you!"


Mr. Clyde: "Azumi Oonishi will face off against
Kat Black. Shelton Benjamin will
face off against US Champion, Tajiri.
And in what will be the last Voltage
appearance of either HHH or Randy
Orton, after they lose at Dissonance
to us, they will be facing the team
of Chris Benoit and Dean Malenko."


Mr. Figaro: "Dean and Chris haven't agreed yet
to Regal's challenge, but they've
been getting prepared to combat
Regal and Vader, in some form,
for weeks. This match was signed
before it even became as relevant
as it is now. Hell, we all just
wanted to see Benoit and Malenko
beat up DX! But now, with Regal's
awesome challenge, this tag match
next week may take on new meaning."


Mr. Clyde: "Hopefully we'll also hear from
them, before or after their match,
and get their answer about the match
at Dissonance. So, until then,
thanks for watching. See you in 2 weeks."


Mr. Figaro: "Quick, let's get out of here, Holly
has started dancing in the ring and
the strippers are walking down the
aisle. Get out, get out! Evacuate!
There will be no survivors!!"



*Fin*