Holly: Season's Greetings
Feb 16, 2007 2:10:40 GMT -5
Post by OrochiGeese on Feb 16, 2007 2:10:40 GMT -5
*Holly is sitting on a couch in her apartment at 11pm. She is wearing a "holiday-themed" knitted sweater (snowflake pattern) and is enjoying some champagne*
Holly: "Oh, I do so love the holidays...everyone is at their happiest and most optimistic. Really, it's the best time of year to crush spirits!"
Holly: "So, I have a few gifts messages for some of the women in OG-Joshi. No, don't be silly, you don't have to get ME anything, I just love giving. After all, it's much better to give then to get..unless you're Jo Ryder and can do both at the same time." *Holly winks*
Holly: "My first gift message is to Dizzy. My ole pal Dizzy. It's been so great meeting you this past year, i think we really "clicked?", don't you? Between watching you cringe over my comments at your mentor to watching you roll around on the ground in pain from my kicks, you have become SUCH a special person in my life!"
Holly: "And that's why I was overjoyed to see you found your true calling after seeing you and Frog together after Thanksgiving!! I'm even surprised to admit that I actually AGREED with your amphibian boyfriend for a change. Both him and I were very surprised you were such a wiz in the kitchen. I never had you pegged as a domestic "Martha Stewart" type, but i guess that's where your TRUE talent lies."
Holly: "Since it's clear that your wrestling prowess just isn't up to my standards. But hey, you can roast, baste a bird, and cook pasta, right? So you are all set for your new life with Frog! Between cooking for him and checking out his computer pornography, you two will make a great life together!"
Holly: "Oh wait...did you still entertain hopes of getting back in the ring? Even after your leg was almost crippled from being in the ring with Haley Cannon and then me? Come now Dizzy...as Frog probably disappointingly says...you really are getting in over your head here."
Holly: "It's really cute that you now dress like Frog and all, and probably think you have harnessed the power of the "Frogsawa tricep", or whatever the hell he tries to use in the ring before he got crushed by Mr. Figaro. But you just need to learn when enough is enough."
Holly: "You wonder how you are going to handle me in the ring? Handle ME? Your mentor and FORMER Joshi superstar Jo Ryder couldn't HANDLE me. I beat her ass harder then...well, this is Jo Ryder, so I don't really think I can exaggerate truthfully here. But the point is, I pinned her, i defeated her, I RULED her in that ring. And you...you're just a little girl with big, unattainable dreams."
*Holly pours herself some more champagne and cocks her head back to leisurely take a drink*
Holly: "You want people to be in AWE of you? Well, I'll tell ya what Dizzy. After the last two times the whole world saw you...i think we'd all be in awe if the NEXT appearance you make, you actually manage to return safely on your own two feet. Yeah, THAT would put us all in awe of your "tremendous abilities": watching you walk back without being CARRIED out of the arena with your fat leg hanging limp from your body."
*Holly begins to shake her leg a bit to simulate the free motion of Dizzy's past broken leg*
Holly: "I'm just looking out for what's best for you, Dizzy dear. You see, you already had your 15 minutes of wrestling fame. Quit now and leave a nice legacy. Go baste turkeys for your boy toy and give Jo Ryder spongebaths for the duration of your "Team Ryder" contract. After all, you have a LOT to look back on and smile!"
Holly: "As much as I hate to admit it, you were the FIRST OG-FPD Joshi Champion. And we ALL know how much OG-FPD and OrochiGeese honor the "First" of anything. Let's look at what we have currently in OG-FPD:
*Holly takes a piece of paper off the table and begins reading from it*
Holly: "Let's see now...we currently have the first ever OG-FPD 2 year anniversary show! And I know OG must think very highly of it because that's all the announcers have been talking about, nonstop, during Voltage! But then again...how big a show can it REALLY be if OG didn't schedule me to be on it? Well, OG, why did you leave me off such an important show? "Doing what's right for business, again?" That's your whole "thing" now right? Just like what you did for Jo Ryder?"
Holly: "But that's ok...as it will give me a chance to stay in my apartment and watch the show without being bothered backstage by any nuisances, like everyone there. And there are other advantages to watching the show too..."
Holly: "Which brings me to Kaori NiGHT and her FIRST EVER "Kaori NiGHT Invited me to her birthday party" tournament that she's been running for the last decade or so. I'm SO looking forward to her match against the tournament winner at the 12/13 show. Cause you see....if I have ANY trouble falling asleep that night while I'm home home, i can just turn the match on to watch "The HiGHliGHT of the NyQUIL," Kaori NiGHT do her thing! So thanks to Geese letting me stay home and Kaori's match...*Holly yawns*, i'll have the best night sleep ever!"
Holly: "Another important "First" in OG-FPD is also happening now and belongs to our Joshi Champion, Haley Cannon. She has the honor of holding the FIRST "I'm going to prance around the world to avoid facing Holly for my title" Tour. Don't worry Haley, i'll wait. Once you are confident enough to get out from hiding under your hotel bed in England, and come and fight me, I promise to make my victory very quick."
Holly: "Next on the list of "First's" is the lovable Alicia Gordon. She was the FIRST women in OG-Joshi to make a completely disappointing impact here. She's been here for how many months and won like, what, one match? Great job Alicia!! You're a credit to Tae-Luchadore-Kwon-Do or whatever it is you say you do on your way to humiliating yourself and losing a match!"
Holly: "It's sad too, you tried to make such a big statement upon arrival. I still remember when you took us on that heartwarming "LA in a day" tour and showed us your past accomplishemnts. I did find it peculiar that ALL your pre-Joshi success was easily summed up in a few hours. But after seeing you here, it all makes sense. Because your OG-Joshi success so far can be summed up in only a few seconds!"
*Holly makes a sad, pouty face*
Holly: "Awwe...I'm sorry..did I hit a nerve? Maybe you should call up your LAWL buddy Marie, eat some ice cream, and watch tapes of Banana vs. Potato wrestling matches!"
Holly: "But I can't talk about unimpressive debuts without talking about Lisa Robinson! She actually one-upped Alicia! Lisa became a failure on her VERY FIRST night at OG-Joshi as i kicked the living hell out of her! It took a few months for us to see the failure Alicia is. But it only took the FIRST five minutes of Lisa's debut for us to see what a loser SHE is. Congratulations Lisa for providing us with that "FIRST" moment of failure!"
Holly: "So as you can all see, I have a lot of joy to spread during the holiday season. I just hope that Dizzy, especially, is watching this message after baking a whole pan of cookies for her animal friends. Don't quit your day job hon, and stay out of my way. It's hard to cook when you are bed-ridden with two broken legs and a crushed spirit. As for the rest of you in OG-Joshi...
*Holly gets a stern look in her eyes*
Holly: "I don't care what anyone says...I'M the best wrestler in this fed. I've had the best matches this entire year and I beat Jo Ryder at Venemous Ties. I can beat anyone here and will proceed to. Whether you are Haley Cannon or Diva Dynamite, if you cross my path, I'll Muff Drive you into obscurity."
*Holly's stern look turns back into her smile*
Holly: "Happy Holidays everyone!"
*The camera begins to fade out*
Holly: "Wait, wait! I almost forgot...since it is the holiday's after all...I want to give some extra Holiday cheer!"
Holly: "Why did the turkey stay near Jo Ryder during Thanksgiving? Because when Jo Ryder is in the room, she's the only thing getting stuffed!!"
Holly: "Oh, I do so love the holidays...everyone is at their happiest and most optimistic. Really, it's the best time of year to crush spirits!"
Holly: "So, I have a few gifts messages for some of the women in OG-Joshi. No, don't be silly, you don't have to get ME anything, I just love giving. After all, it's much better to give then to get..unless you're Jo Ryder and can do both at the same time." *Holly winks*
Holly: "My first gift message is to Dizzy. My ole pal Dizzy. It's been so great meeting you this past year, i think we really "clicked?", don't you? Between watching you cringe over my comments at your mentor to watching you roll around on the ground in pain from my kicks, you have become SUCH a special person in my life!"
Holly: "And that's why I was overjoyed to see you found your true calling after seeing you and Frog together after Thanksgiving!! I'm even surprised to admit that I actually AGREED with your amphibian boyfriend for a change. Both him and I were very surprised you were such a wiz in the kitchen. I never had you pegged as a domestic "Martha Stewart" type, but i guess that's where your TRUE talent lies."
Holly: "Since it's clear that your wrestling prowess just isn't up to my standards. But hey, you can roast, baste a bird, and cook pasta, right? So you are all set for your new life with Frog! Between cooking for him and checking out his computer pornography, you two will make a great life together!"
Holly: "Oh wait...did you still entertain hopes of getting back in the ring? Even after your leg was almost crippled from being in the ring with Haley Cannon and then me? Come now Dizzy...as Frog probably disappointingly says...you really are getting in over your head here."
Holly: "It's really cute that you now dress like Frog and all, and probably think you have harnessed the power of the "Frogsawa tricep", or whatever the hell he tries to use in the ring before he got crushed by Mr. Figaro. But you just need to learn when enough is enough."
Holly: "You wonder how you are going to handle me in the ring? Handle ME? Your mentor and FORMER Joshi superstar Jo Ryder couldn't HANDLE me. I beat her ass harder then...well, this is Jo Ryder, so I don't really think I can exaggerate truthfully here. But the point is, I pinned her, i defeated her, I RULED her in that ring. And you...you're just a little girl with big, unattainable dreams."
*Holly pours herself some more champagne and cocks her head back to leisurely take a drink*
Holly: "You want people to be in AWE of you? Well, I'll tell ya what Dizzy. After the last two times the whole world saw you...i think we'd all be in awe if the NEXT appearance you make, you actually manage to return safely on your own two feet. Yeah, THAT would put us all in awe of your "tremendous abilities": watching you walk back without being CARRIED out of the arena with your fat leg hanging limp from your body."
*Holly begins to shake her leg a bit to simulate the free motion of Dizzy's past broken leg*
Holly: "I'm just looking out for what's best for you, Dizzy dear. You see, you already had your 15 minutes of wrestling fame. Quit now and leave a nice legacy. Go baste turkeys for your boy toy and give Jo Ryder spongebaths for the duration of your "Team Ryder" contract. After all, you have a LOT to look back on and smile!"
Holly: "As much as I hate to admit it, you were the FIRST OG-FPD Joshi Champion. And we ALL know how much OG-FPD and OrochiGeese honor the "First" of anything. Let's look at what we have currently in OG-FPD:
*Holly takes a piece of paper off the table and begins reading from it*
Holly: "Let's see now...we currently have the first ever OG-FPD 2 year anniversary show! And I know OG must think very highly of it because that's all the announcers have been talking about, nonstop, during Voltage! But then again...how big a show can it REALLY be if OG didn't schedule me to be on it? Well, OG, why did you leave me off such an important show? "Doing what's right for business, again?" That's your whole "thing" now right? Just like what you did for Jo Ryder?"
Holly: "But that's ok...as it will give me a chance to stay in my apartment and watch the show without being bothered backstage by any nuisances, like everyone there. And there are other advantages to watching the show too..."
Holly: "Which brings me to Kaori NiGHT and her FIRST EVER "Kaori NiGHT Invited me to her birthday party" tournament that she's been running for the last decade or so. I'm SO looking forward to her match against the tournament winner at the 12/13 show. Cause you see....if I have ANY trouble falling asleep that night while I'm home home, i can just turn the match on to watch "The HiGHliGHT of the NyQUIL," Kaori NiGHT do her thing! So thanks to Geese letting me stay home and Kaori's match...*Holly yawns*, i'll have the best night sleep ever!"
Holly: "Another important "First" in OG-FPD is also happening now and belongs to our Joshi Champion, Haley Cannon. She has the honor of holding the FIRST "I'm going to prance around the world to avoid facing Holly for my title" Tour. Don't worry Haley, i'll wait. Once you are confident enough to get out from hiding under your hotel bed in England, and come and fight me, I promise to make my victory very quick."
Holly: "Next on the list of "First's" is the lovable Alicia Gordon. She was the FIRST women in OG-Joshi to make a completely disappointing impact here. She's been here for how many months and won like, what, one match? Great job Alicia!! You're a credit to Tae-Luchadore-Kwon-Do or whatever it is you say you do on your way to humiliating yourself and losing a match!"
Holly: "It's sad too, you tried to make such a big statement upon arrival. I still remember when you took us on that heartwarming "LA in a day" tour and showed us your past accomplishemnts. I did find it peculiar that ALL your pre-Joshi success was easily summed up in a few hours. But after seeing you here, it all makes sense. Because your OG-Joshi success so far can be summed up in only a few seconds!"
*Holly makes a sad, pouty face*
Holly: "Awwe...I'm sorry..did I hit a nerve? Maybe you should call up your LAWL buddy Marie, eat some ice cream, and watch tapes of Banana vs. Potato wrestling matches!"
Holly: "But I can't talk about unimpressive debuts without talking about Lisa Robinson! She actually one-upped Alicia! Lisa became a failure on her VERY FIRST night at OG-Joshi as i kicked the living hell out of her! It took a few months for us to see the failure Alicia is. But it only took the FIRST five minutes of Lisa's debut for us to see what a loser SHE is. Congratulations Lisa for providing us with that "FIRST" moment of failure!"
Holly: "So as you can all see, I have a lot of joy to spread during the holiday season. I just hope that Dizzy, especially, is watching this message after baking a whole pan of cookies for her animal friends. Don't quit your day job hon, and stay out of my way. It's hard to cook when you are bed-ridden with two broken legs and a crushed spirit. As for the rest of you in OG-Joshi...
*Holly gets a stern look in her eyes*
Holly: "I don't care what anyone says...I'M the best wrestler in this fed. I've had the best matches this entire year and I beat Jo Ryder at Venemous Ties. I can beat anyone here and will proceed to. Whether you are Haley Cannon or Diva Dynamite, if you cross my path, I'll Muff Drive you into obscurity."
*Holly's stern look turns back into her smile*
Holly: "Happy Holidays everyone!"
*The camera begins to fade out*
Holly: "Wait, wait! I almost forgot...since it is the holiday's after all...I want to give some extra Holiday cheer!"
Holly: "Why did the turkey stay near Jo Ryder during Thanksgiving? Because when Jo Ryder is in the room, she's the only thing getting stuffed!!"